Moving forward in my own discernment of my call to ordained ministry

I am extremely grateful for the support of Women’s Ordination Conference and the Lucile Murray Durkin Scholarship this past year. As I struggled to complete my last year of my M.Div studies it meant a great deal to have this financial support, and to know that there are many people who are supporting me in my call to ordained ministry. Knowing that the Lucile Murray Durkin Scholarship was supporting my tuition this year, I focused on courses that would enrich my knowledge of women’s roles in Catholic history, and empower me to move forward in my own discernment of my call to ordained ministry. These courses included: Liturgical Theology; Paul’s Letter’s Context and Theology; Spirituality of Female Mystics; and the History of Women in the Christian Tradition.

In my liturgical theology course I focused my research on Vatican II documents, especially on the role of the laity and permanent deacons. Throughout the past few years I’ve become drawn to the ministry of the diaconate and used this course to help me better understand this role, and to pray about my own call to this ministry. Paul’s Letters Context and Theology provided me with an opportunity to delve deep into some of the most contradictory passages about women. Here, I focused on the role of women deacons and passages concerning women in Paul’s letters. My final project for this course was piecing together a liturgy based solely on information in Paul’s letters that demonstrated what an early Christian liturgy led by women deacons might have looked like. The Spirituality of Female Mystics course exposed me to a multitude of female theologians and spiritual writers who inspired me to pray, write, and preach. My final paper for this course was on Mechthild of Magdeburg and her use of images and intimacy to promote female spiritual authority. Mechthild’s visionary literature asserts feminine spiritual authority as she resists theological norms through the imagery of female bodies in visions that transgress the typical boundaries of Christian women’s bodily actions and depictions. Mechthild is an incredible mystic, poet, writer, visionary, prophet, who inspired me to incorporate her words into many other papers and liturgies!

Through the History of Women in the Christian Tradition course I saw more clearly my own blessings and struggles through the stories of so many women in history. This course also gave me the opportunity to work creatively and write two liturgies for Catholic women. Both liturgies are rooted in the theme of being the beloved of God, and longing to be with the Beloved. One liturgy is a communion service written within the canonical and liturgical regulations of the Catholic Church, so that it could be used at the average Catholic parish without issue. The other liturgy is a creative liberative liturgy rooted in the Catholic tradition but inspired by the stories of women in scripture and the writings and lives of Catholic women. Together the “Communion Service for Catholic Women” and the “New Liturgy for Catholic Women” explore the identity, authority, and spirituality of Catholic women. In striving to build up the feminine Body of Christ they work to create change in the Church. It is my hope that they can be used to inspire, heal, and empower Christian women.

Through the support of the Lucile Murray Durkin Scholarship these courses inspired me to say yes to more opportunities to live into my vocation to preach and preside. This past year I worked as a Resident Minister for the University of San Francisco functioning as a dorm chaplain for an all women’s freshman dorm. I also had the opportunity to preach at St. Ignatius Parish at the University of San Francisco. Additionally, I said yes to regularly preaching and presiding at Dignity San Francisco’s weekly communion service. Again, I am incredibly grateful for the scholarship and the opportunities it has helped me to engage this year.